A few years ago, a family member transitioned to assisted living. The decision felt difficult for her, like a loss of independence. She fought it hard. But once she settled in, something unexpected happened: she found routine, connection, and purpose again.

Watching that shift reframed how I think about financial planning.

As planners, we often approach aging and retirement through a practical lens. We focus on the details: health care plans, long-term care, estate documents, and whether the financial plan can support the years of spending ahead.

Those things matter. But quality of life matters too. So does preserving a sense of agency as your needs, abilities, and priorities change.

Earlier this year, during a conversation about a client’s transition into assisted living, his daughter suggested I read Being Mortal by Atul Gawande.

I’m glad she did. The book changed how I think about the later stages of life and the role planning should play in them.

1. Independence Matters More Than Perfect Safety
One of the book’s core ideas is that many senior living decisions prioritize safety over autonomy. Safety matters, of course. But losing independence can take a real toll on wellbeing.

The best living environments preserve choice: how you spend your day, who you’re around, and what gives you meaning.

We’ve seen this with clients who explore senior communities early, before they need them. Beginning earlier gives families more agency over the decision. It can also help clients gain more life through social connection, activities, and less stress about home maintenance.

2. Purpose Is Fundamental to Wellbeing
Gawande highlights research showing that even small responsibilities, like caring for a plant, can improve wellbeing and longevity for older adults.

The lesson is simple: people need purpose. They need a reason to get out of bed in the morning.

Financial independence is important. But planning should also ask what replaces the structure and meaning that work once provided. People who thrive in this phase often stay connected to hobbies, community, family, or roles where they still feel needed.

3. Define Quality of Life, Before a Crisis
Being Mortal reminds us that our definition of quality of life changes over time.

When we’re younger, it may mean freedom and adventure. Later, it may mean staying close to family, maintaining familiar routines, or enjoying a favorite meal with people we love.

Many families avoid talking about aging until a crisis forces decisions. The book encourages asking better questions sooner:

• What are your fears and goals as you get older?
• What tradeoffs would you be willing, or unwilling, to make?

In our advisory role, we’ve seen how helpful it is when families have these conversations before a medical event or major transition. When your values are clear, decisions become less about guessing and more about honoring what matters most.

Planning for aging doesn’t mean expecting the worst. It means getting clear about what matters most, so that when decisions come, they reflect your values instead of default choices.

At Hill, we believe financial planning is about more than numbers. Taking the long view means helping people live well across every stage of life, with clarity, confidence, and peace of mind.

If this sparks a conversation about aging, independence, or planning for later life, we’re here to help you or someone you care about talk through it. Reach out any time here.